Let’s see, you who are so educated or so cultured, what does calamitad mean? Disimolar? Cataputa? Cerdeza or Cuarzo? What does culapso or bacilar refer to? At a gathering of friends and family in Mexico City last night, we enjoyed to tears remembering the great Spanish humorist.
Coll’s dictionary: for more than 25 years we have laughed with the wit and creativity of José Luis Coll and that dictionary that came into my hands, I don’t remember how, and that now has yellow pages worn out for almost three decades. Did you know it? If not, don’t miss it, because with a twist here and a turn there, the words created are great and complement each other perfectly with their meanings. Here you can enjoy some of the words:
ABARRIMMENT – Tiredness, fatigue, annoyance or discomfort felt by the cleaner.
ABOPENTAMIENT – Who lies frankly and without reserve.
ABUNDANT – Possessing teeth in copious quantity, numerous.
ACCREDITOR – A person to whom something is owed, and who believes that it will be paid.
ADMINISTRATOR – Applies to the person who manages the assets of a lord or entity and keeps a good part of them.
AGUATIC – Relating to water.
ALCALDO – President of the liquid in which a food has been cooked.
ASUNTAMIENTO – Corporation composed of a mayor and several councilors, incapable of resolving the affairs of the neighborhood.
ATLETRA – One who practices exercises that require willpower to pay installments on household appliances.
ATORMENTIR – To cause pain by lying.
AUSCULTOR – Artist who models or carves, while exploring the sounds in the chest of the figure created by him.
AUTHORRIZATION – Action of curling one’s own hair.
BABERÍA – Shop or establishment where slugs are shaved.
BACILAR – Not knowing which bacillus to keep.
BARBERIDAD – Cruelty of the barber who shaves without sharpening the blade.
BIZQUIERDISTA – A squinty-eyed communist.
BOCETADA – A blow given with an open hand in the middle of the face.
BROMEAR – To piss in jest.
BUROGRACIA – Set of cheerful and funny officials.
CACAMELO – Jam with a foul and disgusting taste.
CALABUZO – Place where they lock up those who, without permission of the authority, practice spearfishing.
CALAMITAD – Disgrace, catastrophe, fifty-fifty.
CASPITALIST – A wealthy person who invests a large part of his fortune in having his dandruff cured.
CAUTOMOVILISTA – A person who drives with caution.
CERDEZA – Certainty that one is a pig.
CLEPTOMON – One who steals apes unconsciously and inevitably.
COLUMNIA – False testimony in vertical and with capital.
CHRONOMETER – Clock that is placed in the suburban train stations.
CUARZO – The one that goes before the quinzo.
CHISTERFIELD – American brand of cigarettes that produces laughter for its sharpness and grace.
DEMOGRACY – Humor of the people.
DEMOÑO – Devil, spirit of evil, with hair tied back on the back of the head.
DESVULGAR – To make a person stop being vulgar for the first time in his life.
DETESTIVE – Species of secret police agent absolutely detestable.
DISIMOLATE – To cunningly cover up a toothache.
Culapso: A period of time during which the ass has not been used for anything.
Culorete: A red color worn by women with excessively white or snowy buttocks.
Chisterfield: American brand of cigarettes that produces laughter for its sharpness and grace.
Damador: Person who tames, or who exhibits tamed ladies.
Demogracia: Humor of the people.
Demoño: Devil, spirit of evil, with hair gathered at the back of the head.
Descoñocida: Not pussy.
Desperfecto: The being conceived by a viviparous female, during its development and before its birth, in which a slight deterioration is observed. (Many of them managed to save this obstacle and today occupy preeminent positions).
Désputa: A person who treats harlots harshly.
Desvulgar: To make a person stop being vulgar for the first time in his life.
Detestive: A kind of absolutely detestable secret police agent.
Disimolar: To cunningly cover up a toothache.
Distractor: A person who commits a crime against due fidelity, while at the same time amusing the deceived.
Dromierdario: A camelid ruminant with a single hump on its back, but full of filth for not showering before going to bed.
Empreñarse: To be obstinate in getting pregnant.
Equidistonto: Equal distance between several imbeciles.
Epopeye: Heroic, long poem dedicated to a famous children’s cartoon character.
Estúpedo: Ventosity expelled by the anus in an idiotic and stemporaneous way.
Eta: Separatist letter of the Greek alphabet.
Extremaño: A native of Cáceres born in Zaragoza.
Extrangiro: Sending money to another country.
Gohete: Famous German writer with a cardboard tube full of gunpowder that, attached to a light rod, was raised in the air when given fire.
Grítoris: Female sexual organ that, properly manipulated, takes its owner to the paroxysm of pleasure.
Indiota: Native of India who dies of hunger contemplating a cow.
Jodobado: Corcovado, and also fucked.
Brass: Chinese rodent composed of copper and zinc.
Lantern: Special container to transport discharged batteries.
Lío: Water that goes to palal to the evil or to another mess.
Key ring: Instrument that allows to lose several keys at the same time.
Logic: The right way to arrive at the wrong answer but feeling happy with yourself.
Marciso: Large body of water in love with itself.
Meoyorquino: A New York native who pees in the street, exercising his rights as a U.S. citizen.
Monarchy: Form of government in which the power resides in a monkey.
Murciálago: Vampire of the province of Murcia.
Nobelist: Camilo José Cela.
Parturrienta: A woman who laughs when giving birth.
Penisula: Virile member surrounded by underpants on all sides except for the one that joins it to the trunk.
Pistolerdo: Individual of the Hampa, unskilled in the handling of weapons.
Que: Relative pronoun; that is, it may not even be a pronoun.
Remera: Whore with a canoe.
Tatamuda: Household employee who does not say “esta boca es mía”, when the master checks the morbidity of her buttocks.
Trancanieves: Character of infantile story, that taking advantage of the absence of the dwarfs, she was put purple of Whisky.
Zueco: Andalusian born in Sweden.
